The Chemistry of Love

When two people feel a strong attraction to one another, it’s often said that there is great “chemistry” between them. This saying may not be far from the truth. Dr. Helen Fisher has proposed that there are separate but interrelated neural systems for lust (or sexual desire), passionate love (or attraction), and companionate love (or attachment) in our brains. These three systems regularly act in concert with one another, but they can also act independently. For example, some women and men may engage in intercourse with someone with whom they are not in love, while they are in love with someone with whom they are not having sex, and yet they can feel deeply attached to someone with whom they share little intimacy or passion.

 Using functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI), neuroscientists have concluded that passionate love leads to a suppression of activity in the areas of the brain controlling critical thought. Thus, once we get close to someone, we feel less need to assess their character and personality in a negative way.

Other brain chemicals have been associated with companionate love, particularly with attachment. Two neurotransmitters, oxytocin and vasopressin, are key ingredients to bonding. In humans, oxytocin levels rise during massages, breast feeding, and sexual activity—all experiences where closeness and bonding are enhanced. There is evidence that loving touch of infants, such as massaging, cuddling, and rocking, develops neural pathways in the brain that promotes growth and “hard wires” an individual to be able to feel and express love throughout his or her life. This biological and environmental interaction has been expressed as the link from “skin love, to kin love, to in love.”

In love chemistry there is an important question that is why we fall in love. Is it to escape loneliness? To answer our deepest need? Is it the ultimate extension of our social network? The answer is many.

Firstly proximity plays a vital role. Proximity includes the geographical nearness. When the lover and the beloved stay in a nearest place love can causes so surely. It also happens for gradual communication of two opposite sexual being. The Mere Exposure Effect that is repeated contact with novel stimuli tends to increase liking for the stimuli. People also tend to meet in locations engaging in activities that reflect common interests. Work and school – offer much time shared together and many shared common interests. Frequent chances to appraise and predict also helps to fall in love.

Secondly similarity is an important one. Lovers often share beliefs, values, attitudes, interests and intellect. Usually they have similar levels of physical attractiveness. Tendency to have relationships with those of equal education, social status, age, religion, etc. is generally known as homophile. Another thing is reciprocity. We tend to like people who like us. Beside Couples who show equal levels of affection last longer.

Physical attractiveness also makes love. Attractive people ate both sought as friends and lovers and perceived as possessing many desired qualities. We like to look at them and think they have more to offer. We like being seen with them because we think May be they are more confident and healthier. But as time goes on the importance of beauty fades.